November 7, 2024

F1000 Scientist

Health to Life

I Want Sex But I Can’t Stand Condoms

Having sex should be a pleasurable experience for both men and women, but when condoms get in the way of a good time, this can really put a damper on the experience. Many men experience loss of sensitivity and other discomforts when using a condom.

Why you need condoms

The first thing you need to remember is that condoms not only protect you from unwanted pregnancies but also from sexually transmitted diseases and infections, so they are important. Even if your sexual partner is on contraceptives, you still want to use protection against catching something especially if you’ve just met them.

Getting rid of condoms

If you’ve been with someone for a while, you’ve both had your health checks and she’s on other types of contraception, then you can do away with using condoms. If she’s not on some sort of birth control, then you may want to consider this. There are a multitude of options available, not just the contraceptive pill. The IUD is a device which is inserted into the uterus and provides contraception for at least five years without having to do anything (like remembering to take a pill each day). Research your options with her and get condoms out of your life.

If you need to use them

Unless you’re in a long term exclusive relationship, then you just can’t (or shouldn’t) have sex without one, even if you’ve had a vasectomy or she’s on the pill. As one friend once said to me, you never know what’s lurking down there. So, if you can’t live without them, you must try to improve on the experience. Here are some tips:

  • Choose your type of condom carefully
  • You can buy thinner condoms which are specifically designed to prevent “loss of sensation” (such as Lifestyles Ultra Sensitive)
  • Watch out because the thinner condoms can break more easily, so you may need to check on it or go a little gentler
  • If you do not like condoms because they give you hives or a rash, make you itchy or dizzy, then it’s probably because you’re allergic to latex. It’s time for another material (see your options below).
  • Add texture – some condoms come ribbed, studded and even veined to add more sensation for both of you.
  • Get your sizing right. Don’t go for the largest size in the store just to impress the checkout lady. There’s a chance it could fall off during sex & then you’ll be struck trying to impress a baby instead. Also, if you get one that’s too small or just snug, it could split while you’re inside her. The only way is to buy a few options and see which ones fit best. Beyond Seven is a good brand to try for those who are well endowed.
  • Get her to wear one. Yes there are condoms for her, made of Polyutherane which she can insert hours before sex. But, if she doesn’t do this correctly, you could end up being pregnant or getting a disease.

Comparing the Types of Materials

  • Latex (rubber) – can cause allergic reactions, protect against STD and pregnancy, but like most contraception, not 100%.
  • Polyutherane (such as Trojan Supra or Avanti Polyurethane) – this can be good for getting some sensation back because the material heats up with body heat (so at least you can get closer to the feeling of real contact).
  • Tactylon – similar to polyutherane.
  • Lambskin – can be expensive and does not protect against STD, including HIV.
  • Polyisoprene – (Skyn) non-latex & super soft so it stretches with you and enhances sensations.

You may be saying to yourself but I want sex without condoms! You’re not alone in the battle. Many guys dislike (even hate) wearing them, but you need to think of the purpose they’re serving. In most situations it’s just not feasible to leave protection out of the equation. You need to remember if condoms weren’t around, maybe you wouldn’t be having sex at all. So think yourself lucky they’ve been invented and try to make the experience as comfortable as possible by buying the right ones.

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